National Mild Day

As organised by the Campaign for Real Ale. 

"What's mild?" I hear you ask. It's probably the UK's greatest style of beer. Sweeter than bitter, less heavy than stout or porter. 

If you can find a pub that does it (in the south and east of England, free houses are your best bet; in the midlands or north west you'll have more luck with regional brewers as it's more popular there)... ENJOY. 

I've been an obsessive for mild ever since 1993, when I was having a pint with my dad in Oxford and a punter came into the bar and asked for mild and the barman said "I'm sorry, we don't serve it". Dad muttered "what sort of pub doesn't serve mild? This isn't a pub, it's a shithouse".

Nice one, dad. 

Q: "Hal - where the f*** have you been?" A: "Failing to Kill Slugs".

Hello again after another (more than) 2 week layoff... so what have I been doing that's so important that I couldn't post for all that time?

failing with a beer trap.


I made the trap for the slugs that are really laying into the cabbages we are trying to grow over the winter. Filled a plastic container with some Quilmes Argentinian lager (it was all I had left over from the BBQ we had last week), and sunk it into the soil next to the cabbage patch. Result after 48 hours: a beer trap with two wasps, three beetles, one worm, and no slugs. The bastards are too clever for me. Luckily I have some other alternatives without resorting to chemicals - a border of crushed eggshells (easily available from most garden centres or you could indeed make your own if you eat enough eggs) works well. Note to self: use bitter, instead of lager, in the beer trap in future. Maybe these slugs are CAMRA members.

Never mind... courgettes and squashes are now doing very well and the slugs don't seem to go for them. More excitement from the garden to come in the autumn...

I'd like to say that was all I'd done for the last two weeks. But it would be a lie. I somehow like the idea of someone spending 2 weeks laying a beer trap and then failing miserably. The Lottery will probably give me money to make a film about it with some ex footballers.

Topical blog of the day: quilmes.blogspot.com

(Expect at least one of these with each post from now on. I am trying to find the most genuinely lame and useless blogs out there - and it seems to be surprisingly easy.)